Winds of Change

"Parents who expect change in themselves as well as in their children, who accept it and find in it the joy as well as the pains of growth, are likely to be the happiest and most confident parents."

"Mister" Fred Rogers, Children's Television Host

My family and I are in the midst of a flurry of changes. Nothing big or earth-shattering. Just the ordinary course corrections that we need to occasionally make as we go through our hectic lives and veer away from how we should be living our lives.

So I can tell you that change is hard. It's tiring and slow. I can definitely see why people resist change--you really have to reject fear and pessimism and embrace hope. Because change is also good--it's what keeps us growing and striving and improving as human beings and, I should add, as a nation. It means we're living our lives as fully as possible.

I've already mentioned that we're in the process of giving up television, mainly so that our youngest can develop a strong sense of self and the ability to entertain himself without the constant background noise of the television. That's actually going quite well, and his imaginative play is getting so much more interesting and involved. Last night after dinner he was "Museum Guy" and took us on a tour of his snake museum. Today he let the snakes go free and introduced me to his dinosaur museum. Contrary to what we feared, he's been able to amuse himself in his room with Legos and puzzles without needing help. He's starting to offer us narrative alternatives to the stories we tell him at night. In short, he's growing and changing.

My older son is so ripe for changes in his life. Just this month he started riding his two-wheeler without training wheels after years of fighting it. He's riding confidently through our neighborhood to his friend's house. And, in his second year of taking viola lessons, he is practicing consistently and with joy. After constant battles with him last year over practicing, I never thought I would hear him utter these words: "When can I practice my viola?" and "I LOVE playing the viola!"

In the same spirit, I'm trying to embrace some changes that I need to make in my life. The biggest one is making healthier choices in what and how much I eat, and that's been an extremely tough change. In the last few weeks I've realized just how much I use food--especially sweets--as a way to muffle negative emotions, so it's been a rocky time for me emotionally, with some pretty wild mood swings. I've found it very tough trying to fit exercise into my schedule, and I'm learning that for me blog reading and writing and strange sleeping patterns are not compatible with getting fit. So I've been trying to limit my time on the computer, which I'm sure has contributed to my mood swings! It's not an easy addiction to give up.

My husband, the more sensible of us, suggested that we follow a more civilized evening routine with the kids. I run kicking and screaming when anyone utters the word "routine," so this has not been an easy change to implement. I'm more into being mellow and letting things happen, but unfortunately I think that was stressing the kids out more than it was helping them relax.

Today was our first day with the new schedule, and the kids responded so well to set homework, dinner, and play times. It made things go so much more smoothly before and after dinner, without some of the usual arguments about snacks or homework or whining about wanting to go to the park, etc. We actually got everything we needed to done and had time for fun stuff. We went to the park after homework was done and while the sun was still out. After dinner, the boys even played together PEACEFULLY while my husband and daughter worked on the computer and I knitted. Amazing, and I hope we can keep it up.

What changes are you in the midst of?.

Note: The illustrations above are by George M. Richards and are from Arthur I. Gates and Miriam Blanton Huber, The Work-Play Books, Make and Make-Believe, Third Reader, The Macmillan Company, New York, 1937--another Friends of the Library Sale find.